I had a moment yesterday that just flawed me…left me speechless. Our Sunday conversation was about Why I can’t Honor my parents and everyone was sharing some real raw emotion about hurts and disappointments. Some of the stories were unbelievable but that’s not what flawed me. In the middle of a gut wrentching story being told by an 18 year old that I had known for ten years but had not seen in almost a year he said…’I am a Christian NOW…I got saved a couple weeks ago.’
2 years ago this kid was a Buddhist…I invited him to church…he came for a while and I was convinced he was there because it was across the street from his work and we had free donuts. But we loved him…and then one day he stopped coming and I could never seem to catch up with him. Then yesterday he shows up and said ‘I am a Christian NOW’. WOW….
In 1 Corinthians 3:6 Paul said I planted, Apollos watered but God makes it grow. I was flawed by the majesty of God in those 5 little words…’I am a Christian NOW’. At that moment…God smacked me and said I always make things grow and my word never returns void.
Don’t be discouraged…Love like Jesus…God will bring the increase.
Long before I got married, before I was a pastor or a minister, maybe even before I was a Follower of Christ a guy said to me:
Men NEVER win arguements with their wives!!!
His rationale was simple, If you argue with your wife and you somehow prove that you are right…later that night you will loose. And if you were wrong in the first place…later that night you will loose.
So…being married to a psychologist and a marriage counselor I always figured I had no chance at winning any argument. In fact, early in our marriage when we had any type of conflict my wife just put me on her ‘couch’ and began a counseling session.
But…we are BOTH pastors and we both studied and asked…God how do you want us to resolve conflict in our marriage. Surprisingly….God’s answer was ‘Man can never win an argument’. Jesus said in order to be His follower we must Die to ourselves and pick up our cross daily (Luke 9:23). Here is what He is saying as far as conflict goes: when we have conflict with our spouse we are to put down our selfishness, put down our desire, put down our egos, put down our will and PICK UP His desire.
Jesus says neither man nor woman can win an argument, neither of us can triumph in conflict. He says when you have conflict turn to me.
Let me not sugar coat this and make it seem easy…Its not. In fact I often fail at it. But what I can tell you is when in conflict if I step away and say ‘ok GOD…what do you want here’, He opens my eyes to resolutions and truths I never imagined.
Next time you have conflict with your spouse, pause for a moment and give God a try. Dont ask Him to make them see it your way. Rather ask Him to make you see it HIS way.
Solomon was considered to be the wisest man of the Bible’s Old Testament. He was a guy who was thought to have everything:
- Money
- Power
- Respect
- Women
On top of all that he was also an author. In one of the books of the Bible that Solomon wrote he gives us a lesson and starts that lesson with these 3words…’Above All Else’. I don’t know about you but if the wisest man of the Bible says ‘above all else’ Im going to listen because I figure what comes next is the most important thing out there. So…here is what Solomon wrote in Proverbs 4:23:
Above all else, guard your heart because it is the wellspring of life.
When I first read that I felt cheated. After years of mulling and reading I started to understand what Solomon was saying. He was warning us that everything we put into our hearts eventually comes out and defines who we are. Jesus years later summed it up this way in Luke 6:45 – For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. That one stung.
How many times have we said words and then I did not mean it? How many times have we said things at inappropriate times? How many times have we thought thoughts we could erase? How often has your tongue gotten you into trouble?
People like to think that us pastors are perfect and always say and do the right things…Maybe your pastor is perfect but I know I’m a flawed human being. And Solomon and Jesus are saying to us the hurts, pain, hard feelings, jealousy, anger, guilt, shame, greed, lust, deceitfulness, and anything else that we hide in our hearts will eventually overflow and come out of our mouths.
Solomon tells us to guard our hearts…he means dont hide things in your heart. He says this because he knows that when we get frustrated and blurt out something hurtful to someone else that we really mean it because its whats in our heart.
So whats in your heart?
Have you like me hidden things in your heart that you need to clear out. Feel free to share or hit the Contact page and email me directly if you’d like help working through some things.
For the Audio of this sermon check it out on Itunes
